How to Stay Calm When Your Kid Acts Out
Every parent gets angry at the children when they act out.
It’s natural phenomenon, and there is really nothing wrong with the feeling of
anger as it can be used to deliver a message to the kid. But, what is commonly
observed is that parents get angry and they keep advancing in that anger until
a point when they start considering their kid as an enemy. This is what you
need to be wary about because this ‘fight or flight’ only makes things worse.
As a matter of fact, when you see that your child is angry,
you need to look at what he basically needs. The feeling of anger in a kid is
usually triggered by extreme emotions which usually involve fear. There are a
lot of things that you can do to make things correct but first you will need to
calm yourself down. Although, it may seem difficult, it is the only way you can
bring your child’s habit of acting out down to zero.
So, this little article is regarding how parents can stay
cool when their kids act out.
Take notice when you
are getting annoyed
We breathe the firestorm of anger after a process of getting
annoyed. This process usually involves gathering of emotional kindling which
usually involves self-assurance regarding negativity of the child. When we are
fully assured about this negativity, we take all actions to punish the kid out
of anger. So, when you are in the process of gathering kindling, stop thinking
in this direction.
The inner pause
button
Everyone can hit the pause button while yelling due to
anger. This process of pausing usually starts with a deep breath and diverting
attention from the matter on temporary basis. You can even walk out of the room
or home. This pausing is not something to be ashamed of. As a matter of fact,
you are practicing good anger management techniques.
Emotions in your body
Although emotions belong to the brain, there are some inner
body changes that occur when you get angry. For instance, the belly gets stiff
and suffocation occurs in throat. So, when you have these feelings, you can
simply take deep breaths and feel the air flowing through these areas. That
will surely keep you from acting on your anger.
Do some emotional
shifting
While you are angry, you feel urgency to teach your kid a
big lesson. If you go down this road, you are never going to calm down. So, you
can shift the emotional state by thinking that everything your child is doing
is just because he is a child, and that he cannot understand things like a
mature person. When you are able to assure yourself this way, you are actually
starting to be an ideal parent.
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